Best Things heard on the mountain....

Discussion in 'General Skiing' started by Ron, Nov 14, 2015.

  1. Ron

    Ron Don't judge a ski by its width underfoot! Pugski Ski Tester

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    I was recently discussing one of the funniest things I ever heard while skiing....

    Last season in Jackson, a dude entered a section way too hot and endo'd down a steep and icy section. @Chris Geib @FTM @SBrown @coskigirl and @SkiNurse and I were just coming into the section, Sbrown skied down with others to hopefully find him still breathing..... as we skied over, we called down "Is he OK?", Sbrown responded "yeah, he's just bleeding"
     
    LeLeedler, elemmac, Tony S and 6 others like this.
  2. Thread Starter
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    Ron

    Ron Don't judge a ski by its width underfoot! Pugski Ski Tester

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    Feel free to post up other tasty bits....


    Last season on a deep morning around Christmas I shared the gondi with some folks who has southern drawls (that's all I'm saying) and the woman says to her husband, "this is terrible! When are the snow plows gonna come out and get rid of all this powder"
     
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  3. Blue Streak

    Blue Streak Behind the Epic Curtain Skier

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    OK, here's at true story.
    I'm sitting on the lift at Vail with a nice lady from Texas (back in the days when they did midday grooming), and a sign on one of the pylons read "CAUTION SNOW CATS," or something to that effect.
    She looked at me with a suprised and somewhat fearful expression and asked, "Are there really snow cats on the mountain!"
    I didn't miss a beat.
    "Yes Maam, you must have missed the piece last week in the Vail Daily. A Texan was attacked on Born Free and eaten by one on Friday."
     
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  4. Philpug

    Philpug Enjoying being back on two skis. Admin Pugski Ski Tester

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    Not on the mountain but when we were at the base of Copper..we were asked "Where's the ski hill at?"
     
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  5. Thread Starter
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    Ron

    Ron Don't judge a ski by its width underfoot! Pugski Ski Tester

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    ^^ Ouch... I would think that would be at the boat! :D
     


  6. coskigirl

    coskigirl Making fresh tracks Skier

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    Maybe they were hoping for a hill instead of a mountain? :confused:
     
  7. Drahtguy Kevin

    Drahtguy Kevin Après aficionado Pugski Ski Tester

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    "The East Wall got douched by jack wagons traversing across the fall line." -- @SBrown. Maybe not a direct quote by pretty close.
     
  8. Don in Morrison

    Don in Morrison I Ski Better on Retro Day Skier

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    I was riding up the lift with a buddy and someone biffed it pretty bad down below. The only thing my buddy could think of to say was, "Do you need an ambulance?" Turns out he was ok.
     
  9. Drahtguy Kevin

    Drahtguy Kevin Après aficionado Pugski Ski Tester

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    Another, not so much a heard but a seen. I was on Lenawee Lift at A-Basin with FTM. We saw a knuckle dragger dressed like a rodeo clown hauling anus when he caught his tip and slingshoted face first. First thing he did when he got up was check his teeth. Still chuckle when I go over that area.
     
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  10. Don in Morrison

    Don in Morrison I Ski Better on Retro Day Skier

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    I was with another friend, getting ready to hop onto the T-bar. It was his first ride on a T-bar. I spend 10 minutes in the lift line lecturing him on proper T-bar technique, including the perils of sitting on the T-bar. Tried to tell him that sitting on the T-bar was a guaranteed horrible death, that it was not a survivable event. Since y'all already know how that played out, as he was picking himself up after the crash, I said to him, "I told you not to sit on the bar." Whereupon he replied, in all earnestness, "How did you know?"
     
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  11. KevinF

    KevinF Gathermeister-Stowe Team Gathermeister

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    Getting into Stowe's Goat trail -- one of more (in)famous bump runs in New England -- involves a 50' traverse through the trees past the usual double-black diamond signs, "experts only" signs, etc. Once you're in, you're immediately greeted with rocks, ice and moguls.

    At any rate, one time I came in and the previous person had yard sale'd so I helped him collect his gear. I asked him if he was ok and he responded "yeah... I didn't realize there would be moguls".

    WTF?
     
    Tricia likes this.
  12. Brad J

    Brad J Getting on the lift Skier

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    I had brought my older cousin to to Alta and we hit a great day with 12"+ of fresh powder, my cousin being a longtime eastern skier at lunch said " this will be good once this gets packed out"
     
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  13. Tricia

    Tricia The Velvet Hammer Admin Pugski Ski Tester

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    Best thing heard on the mountain: BOOM!
    Love hearing the avy control in the morning
     
    Big J, SSSdave, John O and 12 others like this.
  14. SBrown

    SBrown Steve Admin Pugski Ski Tester

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    For some reason, the girls in my family think bleeding faces are funny. [photoshop cred: Midwest Pete from epic]
    image.jpg
     
    Last edited: Nov 15, 2015
  15. Andy Mink

    Andy Mink I am a half fast skier. Moderator

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    I grew up skiing in PA. My wife grew up skiing Tahoe. On one visit back east we drove past Camelback. I told her that was my ski area. She said it looks more like a golf course. Apparently everything is relative.
     
  16. Jilly

    Jilly Lead Cougar Skier

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    Skiing down Nansen at Tremblant, green beginners long run, came across an adult male having problems getting up after a fall. Helped him up. In his clipped british voice he stated that - real snow is slipperier than the carpet! Duh....And probably colder too!
     
  17. KingGrump

    KingGrump Most Interesting Man In The World Team Gathermeister

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    Yup, my favorite ring tone for my morning alarm in the mountains.
    The best part is most patrols are very considerate and usually hold off the start the control work until 7:00 am even though they are up there way earlier.
     
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  18. Lorenzzo

    Lorenzzo Right On The Line Skier

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    I'm riding up Payday, a six pack, with an east coaster who had obviously just gotten into town. He asked me: "So this is a detachable chair?" I said ""Yes." He then asked: "When does it detach?"

    Then he looks down at my skinny race skis and asks, with condescension: "So you're just learning?"
     
    Big J, slowrider, bbinder and 2 others like this.
  19. Muleski

    Muleski Skiing the powder Industry Insider

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    Our son skied for a season as a PG with the Jackson Hole Ski Club. He hit the record snow year there, and they "sadly" had a number of days when their training had to be cancelled at Snow King with all of the fresh snow, and they were "forced" to go ski at the village in the knee deep stuff. He jokes that it nearly ruined his race career, and re-ignited his passion for just letting it rip. He was riding up the big red box one day, and was wearing a JHSC coat. He's always looked older than his age, and a woman next to him presumed that he was a coach, I guess. She asked him if he lived in Jackson. Yes.

    Then she asked him: "At what elevation do the deer turn into elk?"

    As he tells the story, he didn't miss a beat, and said something like "As closely as they can measure it, at about 6200 feet…." She nodded and thanked him.

    We still joke about it all the time. The other classic one he heard in CO was: "Is that the same sun that we have in Texas?"
     
    Big J, Yo Momma and Philpug like this.
  20. Monique

    Monique bounceswoosh Skier

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    Last weekend at Loveland, going up the lift, the topic of the Enforcer came up. Dude-bro next to us says, "Oh yeah, my friend had the proto pair - the only one they made." Me: "Oh, the black one?" Him: "Yeah!" Me: "I'm pretty sure you're wrong, unless your friend's name is Phil and he skis in Tahoe." Dude-bro looked very confused, and wasn't sure how to keep bragging.
     
    Tricia, skibob, ejj and 3 others like this.

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