• For more information on how to avoid pop-up ads and still support SkiTalk click HERE.

21 Things Nobody Ever Says While Skiing

SkiNurse

Spontaneous Christy
SkiTalk Tester
SkiTalk Supporter
Joined
Nov 9, 2015
Posts
1,698
Location
Colorado
(Poached from Semi-Rad)

  1. “Yeah, today I’m skiing, but snowblades are my real passion”
  2. “You know what would make this even better? Rain.”
  3. “Oh, do you need to get by? Here, just ski over the top of my skis.”
  4. “I wish I could have gone to work today instead of doing this.”
  5. “This place is way more fun when there’s about 36 inches less snow.”
  6. “You know what really made my skiing better in the past few years? The selfie stick.”
  7. “I never really liked face shots.”
  8. “Let me tell you about my top 5 mediocre ski days.”
  9. “If I know it’s going to be a powder day, I like to get up early, go to the gym and do 5-6 sets of squats and deadlifts, 4-5 reps each set, as heavy as I can, before I head up to the mountain to ski.”
  10. “In the summertime, I like to wear these boots when I take my dog for walks.”
  11. “… and I finally said to them, “Thanks, but 11 inches is way too much new snow for me. I think I’ll stay home this time.’”
  12. “If you know what you’re doing, one pole is more than enough.”
  13. “I hope my kids don’t ever want to experience something like this.”
  14. “… and then they said, ‘You can either keep dating me, or you keep skiing—not both.’ So today’s my last day of skiing, ever.”
  15. “It takes me an hour and a half to drive here, but I really only need to ski for about 30 minutes and I’m good for the day.”
  16. “I know, it’s a beautiful day and the snow is great, but I just can’t stop thinking about how I need to clean my garage.”
  17. “If we’re lucky, the wind will pick up to 35-40 mph after lunch.”
  18. “Ask anybody—The Phantom Menace is the best Star Wars movie of the whole franchise.”
  19. “I’m in charge of building the moguls here.”
  20. “I wish this chairlift ride took twice as long.”
  21. “My kid fell down at the top of Chair 9, but I was like, ‘Sorry, bud, it’s a powder day.’ He’s almost six—he’ll figure it out.”
https://semi-rad.com/2019/01/21-thi...Gh7zV0uH0MCLnb_bLKUpw-dUzJuCqyQDbTg9rwVcc3l-A
 

Josh Matta

Skiing the powder
Pass Pulled
Joined
Dec 21, 2015
Posts
4,123
#2. can actually be true. In fact I actually tend to ski on the rain days if its been hardpack recently.

#19 I actually do make bump lines on my local mountain.....

just playing but good list others wise.
 

surfsnowgirl

Instructor
Skier
Joined
May 12, 2016
Posts
5,764
Location
Magic Mountain, Vermont
Another vote for rain skiing if it's warmer and it's been hard packed in the days prior. #10 I have been known to get desperate enough by October to watch football with my ski boots on. #19 my friend's said something similar about her daughter, she's 11, she'll figure it out. Ha ha haha.

There's some good ones on that list. Thanks for making me smile.
 

Coach13

Making fresh tracks
Skier
Joined
Nov 15, 2015
Posts
2,091
Location
No. VA
#5 I have seen folks leave the mountain cuz there’s too much snow for the grommers to keep up.
 

Primoz

Skiing the powder
Skier
Joined
Nov 8, 2016
Posts
2,483
Location
Slovenia, Europe
4. “I wish I could have gone to work today instead of doing this.”

Actually... that's what I said today, half way through my classic xc ski session when I didn't even know anymore if I still have my hands or someone steal them... After 14 days being on skis every single day, and most of that was on xc skis, I'm so damn dead tired, I'm really looking forward for day in office tomorrow :yahoo:
 

crgildart

Gravity Slave
Skier
Joined
Nov 12, 2015
Posts
16,321
Location
The Bull City
Back before seeded bumps the freestyle team used to ski in single file lines over and over down the same run to build the bumps for upcoming competitions.
 

Choucas

Getting off the lift
Skier
Joined
Feb 17, 2016
Posts
342
Location
Vermont
I have said #3 or something very close to it, often with an additional colorful descriptor of the person doing the walking. They usually stop, but sometimes they act like they don't speak English (often true) or pretend to be deaf. Always amusing.
 

jack97

Out on the slopes
Skier
Joined
Jul 7, 2017
Posts
924
Great list. I have to say #13 has crossed my mind when I find myself on a narrow trail surrounded by exposed rocks/boulders and an icy patch thrown in just for kicks.
 

Bad Bob

I golf worse than I ski.
Skier
Joined
Dec 2, 2015
Posts
5,843
Location
West of CDA South of Canada
So long as it is only raining on the bottom of the mountain I'm in.
On the Rather be at work part, does getting to bill for it count?
Have been on the mogul building crew, that can be good duty.
 

jzmtl

Intermidiot
Skier
Joined
Apr 25, 2017
Posts
323
Location
Montreal
#23 I wish we had a few more of those pouring rain then -20 cycles.

Last weekend at Tremblant, had two cycles of 20 mm rain then -20, with people polishing the ice smooth in between, my freshly sharpened edges had no hold, couldn't even hockey stop at some spots, never seen ice this hard in my entire skiing life.
 

WheatKing

Ice coast carveaholic
Skier
Joined
Dec 24, 2015
Posts
258
Location
Ontario, Canada
I've uttered #20 a few times.. but then again.. i'm usually at a place with 250ish' of vert

Actually i've uttered most of them.. but i'm a highly sarcastic person.
 

CalG

Out on the slopes
Pass Pulled
Joined
Feb 5, 2017
Posts
1,962
Location
Vt
4. “I wish I could have gone to work today instead of doing this.”

Actually... that's what I said today, half way through my classic xc ski session when I didn't even know anymore if I still have my hands or someone steal them... After 14 days being on skis every single day, and most of that was on xc skis, I'm so damn dead tired, I'm really looking forward for day in office tomorrow :yahoo:
It's the XC in your experience that presents the issue.

Replace that modifier with "bottomless powder" (skis) and the world will be a better place for everyone!
 

DanoT

RVer-Skier
Skier
SkiTalk Supporter
Joined
Nov 12, 2015
Posts
4,788
Location
Sun Peaks B.C. in winter, Victoria B.C. in summer
“I never really liked face shots.”

True story:

One time at the end of an epic blower powder day (thigh deep to waist deep) I said to a random lady at the ski rack: "What a day, I think I set a personal record for face shots in a single day". Her reply: "I hope you didn't hurt yourself". Me::micdrop:
 

Sponsor

Top